How Effective Are You In An Emotionally Intelligent Relationship?

In marriages and couple relationships, each person has to do what he or she can to make the relationship healthy.  Take this quiz to see how you are doing with your part in a healthy couple relationship.

1.    I am often able to see my partner’s mistakes or hurtful actions in a forgiving or “opportunity to learn” light.             
          Yes                                   No
 
2.  I look for ways to repair damage when we are having a discussion that involves differences of opinion                                                         
          Yes                                  No
 
3.  I look for ways to be nurturing in our relationship.
          Yes                                   No
 
4.  There are many things about my partner that I like or admire.
           Yes                                 No
 
5.  I am able to hear my partner’s concerns and resist giving unsolicited advice.
           Yes                                No
 
6.  I find ways to connect with my partner in positive and caring ways every day.
           Yes                                No
 
7.  I value my partner’s opinion and generally give it a lot of weight when we are discussing an issue.
           Yes                                No
 
8.  When we discuss a problem, I am generally able to talk about it in ways that are respectful and caring.
          Yes                                 No
 
9.  I do not feel that one fight or negative comment destroys the day.
           Yes                                No
 
10.  I recognize that we have differences that are probably not resolvable and I have learned to accept those differences.
          Yes                                 No
 
 11.  I am able to take my partner’s side in their relationship struggles at work or with their family.
          Yes                                 No
 
 12.  My partner rarely complains that I ignore him/her.
            Yes                               No
 
 13.  I know my partner’s dreams and fears.
           Yes                                No
 
 14.  I can clearly recall romantic and happy times with my partner and revisit them periodically.
           Yes                                No
 
 15.  I let my partner know on a regular basis that she/he has qualities and actions that I appreciate.
           Yes                                No
 
16.  I know the names of my partner’s best friends.
           Yes                                No
 
17.  I know what situations cause my partner stress.
           Yes                                No
 
18.  I know how to calm and soothe myself in stressful situations.
           Yes                                No

19.  I am able to express giving, loving and caring in our sex life.
            Yes                               No
 
20.  My partner would describe me as his/her best friend.
            Yes                               No 

21.  I take good care of my partner
      Yes                                     No
 
22.  I am able to be empathetic to my partner, even in challenging times.
          Yes                                 No
 
23.  My partner would say that he/she feels respected in this relationship.
          Yes                                 No
 
24.  I know how to promote humor and fun in our lives.
         Yes                                  No
 
25.  I can say “I am sorry” to my partner.
        Yes                                   No
 
If you answered “yes” to 20 or more, congratulate yourself on knowing how to be part of an emotionally intelligent relationship.

Want to learn more about emotional intelligence and its effect on relationships?  Contact us at Couples Counseling, we are available to help live in person or online.